Love Addiction Test

The Love Addiction Test was created by IDRlabs on the basis of the book Facing Love Addiction: Giving Yourself the Power to Change the Way You Love by counselors Pia Mellody, Andrea Wells Miller, and J. Keith Miller.

The test provides feedback such as the following:

Obsessive Other Focus involves a constant preoccupation with one's partner, often at the expense of other important areas of life. This can manifest as frequent, intrusive thoughts about the partner and a compelling urge to monitor their activities, such as checking their social media or messages. Individuals with this trait may find it difficult to concentrate on work or personal tasks, as their thoughts are dominated by their partner. This obsessive focus can lead to anxiety and stress, especially when they are not in constant contact with their partner, often resulting in rearranging their own schedules to accommodate their partner’s needs.

Discomfort Being Single refers to the anxiety and unease individuals feel when they are not in a relationship. This discomfort can drive a person to quickly enter new relationships after a breakup, seeking to fill the void left by the previous partner. Being single may evoke feelings of loneliness, incompleteness, and restlessness. For these individuals, the idea of being alone is distressing, often leading them to prioritize being in a relationship over the quality of that relationship. This can result in a cycle of rebound relationships and a perpetual need for companionship to feel secure and content.

Staying in Bad Relationships describes the tendency to remain in relationships that are harmful, unfulfilling, or dysfunctional. Individuals with this trait may rationalize or excuse their partner's negative behaviors, holding on to hope that things will improve despite evidence to the contrary. Fear of change, attachment, and the dread of being alone can compel them to endure mistreatment or neglect. They might accept behaviors from their partner that they wouldn't tolerate from others, often compromising their own well-being. This pattern can lead to prolonged emotional distress and hinder personal growth and happiness.

Seeking Validation highlights the reliance on a partner for self-esteem and a sense of self-worth. Individuals exhibiting this behavior often require constant reassurance and approval from their partner to feel confident and valued. Their self-image is closely tied to their relationship status and how their partner perceives them. This dependency can lead them to change their opinions, behaviors, or even core values to gain their partner’s approval. Such individuals may struggle with feelings of worthlessness or unattractiveness when they are single or when they perceive a lack of affirmation from their partner, impacting their overall emotional well-being.

Fear of Abandonment is characterized by intense anxiety about the possibility of a partner leaving. This fear can lead to behaviors aimed at preventing abandonment, such as excessive reassurance-seeking, clinginess, or acquiescing to a partner's demands. The thought of a breakup can induce panic and desperation, prompting individuals to stay in unhealthy relationships longer than they should. They might also project their fears onto their partner, frequently accusing them of wanting to leave or not caring enough. This pervasive fear can strain the relationship, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy where the partner feels smothered or driven away.

Neglecting Self-Care involves prioritizing a partner’s needs over one’s own to the point of self-neglect. Individuals with this trait may sacrifice their own well-being, interests, and personal boundaries to cater to their partner. They often have difficulty saying no, even when complying with their partner’s wishes harms them. This behavior can lead to the abandonment of hobbies, interests, and social connections, as all focus is directed toward the partner. Over time, this neglect can deteriorate their physical and mental health, causing burnout, resentment, and a loss of personal identity as their own needs and desires are continually suppressed.

Total Love Addiction: Your tendency toward dysfunctional love addiction. Higher scores indicate a greater risk of love addiction.

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